One Year Home

So a year ago today, right around this time, I was reunited with Angeline VanHalle after being apart for a month, and Claudia and I were both able to give her a big hug and kiss. We were all run-down, beat-up and exhausted…I think. I mean, ...it’s the only thing that makes sense, right?

I had been up for 30+ hours, traveling with an upset toddler the entire time, including a five hour layover in JFK after a 6 hour flight. Angie had to take a Nursing Exam the morning that we were scheduled to get home – she finished it and drove right to the airport to pick us up. Claudia still had a lot of adjusting left to do. I had a massive headache from having lost my broken glasses, and the eyestrain it caused me to try to read signs in the airports. Angie hadn’t been sleeping well, and the additional stress of Claudia and I being so far away was really taking its toll - on top of her last semester of school. The house we were going home to wasn’t big enough for us all, and wasn’t as finished as I wanted it to be.

But I have to work pretty hard to remember all of that, just a year later. What I do remember is the feeling of holding Angie again after being apart. Of stepping off the plane with Claudia knowing that she is now a US Citizen, and that we’re almost home. Getting home and falling asleep with my wife and daughter. Appreciating that I can reach out and take my wife’s hand whenever I want – not having to use Skype to talk to her. Seeing Angie and Claudia together again, after way too little time in Colombia. Even if I wanted to, I don’t think I could forget these moments. And then getting to go to Noah’s birthday party as a family, where this picture was taken by Ben Schoenfelder. 

 

To me, this picture represents what comes from willingly facing adversity, and overcoming it. The look of contentment on Claudia’s face was one we thought we might never see. The smile you can just barely see on Angie’s face - from something as simple as combing her daughter’s hair. These things don’t come easily, but they are more than worth it. It won’t feel like it when you’re facing them, but the obstacles you face will turn into nothing more than milestones with time. You’ll look back on the catastrophes and they’ll just be another story to share.

And the good memories get even better. Happy Homecoming day Claudia – it’s almost impossible to believe that it’s been a year already.

And Happy Valentine’s Day Ang – Eleven of these ago, I never would have dreamed this is where we would be, or understood the joy that comes from living a life with such purpose. And I know that I wouldn’t be the man than I am, or have the life that I do if you weren’t a part of it.\

 

Cross-posted from my Facebook page.

November

November is National Adoption Awareness Month, and I am writing frantically right now to try to get this posted before today becomes tomorrow. I have every excuse in the World for being as behind as I am on my goals right now, but at this point all I can do is try to make up for lost time.

I posted a picture of Vaughn with my last entry, as an introduction to the who and the why; this post is going to be more about the how.

I believe that every child deserves a chance. Every. Child.

I don't think that this is an unreasonable expectation, some people might, and I can understand that.

Before my own experience with adoption, I would have told you that I didn't believe God would act directly in my life. Oh, sure, I would have said I believed he could act in my life in a direct way, but in my heart, I never would have believed he would. But by the time Claudia was home, there was no possible way for me to believe God hadn't acted directly in my life.

I am as cynical and pragmatic as the next person (probably more so) but there was no way for so many coincidences to actually be coincidences. The coin was landing on heads, every time. The dice kept landing on double sixes. Maybe the most accurate representation I can give - we kept hitting the lottery, every single day. Statistically possible? Sure, in an astronomical numbers kind of way. But especially after comparing our adoption experience to many, many other similar ones, I believe a much more likely answer to be that there was a deft hand catching the coin, magnets in the dice, and the lottery was rigged in our favor.

Why do I mention all of this, on the first day of Adoption Awareness Month? Because for all of you who have never given adoption a single thought, who think that you don't want kids, who are scared at the thought of having a child with or without a disability, and who see just how many kids are out there, without a family - there is Hope.

The goal of this post is not to make you think you are Mother Theresa, deep down, and you just needed to read a blog post by a weird engineer to see it. The goal is to show you that you can be a miracle for someone else. You can be an answer to prayer. You can catch someone who is falling.

You can have a lifelong impact on a child's life, on their family, on the community around that family, and subsequently, the World. Don't believe me? You should - because I've been on the other side of it. I've been the one receiving the sacrificial gifts from complete strangers - and it changes you. It changes the way you see the World. It re-energizes you, keeps your faith up, gets you back in the fight.

I can only imagine what it feels like for a child who has gone their entire life without anyone ever telling them "I love you" or "You are wanted" or "This is your family, forever" to hear that they have someone coming to bring them home. How much extra joy it would bring to the World for every orphan to find their family. And you can be a part of that.

Please consider donating to Vaughn, so that nothing stands in the way of his family coming to get him.